Question without an Answer

It's been a hell of a weekend.

National Championship in synchro-skating. Didn't go as expected, even if we had such great practices before. We had many good practices, but it didn't go as expected. And the judges gave us weird points, even our coaches didn't understand why they gave us those points. They're going to talk with the judges and ask what did cause this low points.

In about three weeks or so, we're going to Zagreb, for the season's last competition. And the last one I'll participate too, 'cause after that I'll become too old for the junior team. Hope that it will end good.

And now, we have something called sport's vacation, one week off from school when you can go skiing somewhere, or do other sports.
My whole family has gone upwards in Sweden to go skiing and snowboarding etc. But I'm left home, because I have to attend skating practices for Zagreb. I'm okay with it, 'cause now I can be home without all the noise the family does.

Today, I've been sleeping as long as I needed, and rented some movies and just done nothing specially. Something I usually can't do. So I'm enjoying it very much! Even though the movies wasn't the best ones...

But things always bothers me, and this what-to-do-with-future thing does bother me now. I really have to decide soon. And I've been thinking in different perspectives, no answer. How the hell am I suppose to find the answer? I mean, sure, the best is to continue study somewhere, but I find Sweden too boring for that, for the moment.

And I'm really not sure how my feelings for things are right now. I have simply no idea. I can't identify my feelings. I'm so messed up right now. I have no answer... I have no idea. Dunno what to do. I feel I can't find anything if I stay here like this, but at the same time, where would I ever find anything than here? Where to go otherwise?


I'm lost


sigh...

Chocolate cake, succeed!

I made it!! (^O^)b
I made a GOOD chocolate cake! (Kladdkaka recipe sv)
And it tastes just as it should, not too sweet, not too sticky. It's just as it should be and at last, I could make one perfectly!!

If you don't know, I'm not a good friend with "Baking/Cooking"-thing. I'm one of the best in the category "Can't successfully do the easiest recipes". I'm always screwing it up somewhere. Except when I do "Chocolate balls", the easiest recipe ever, just mix some ingredients and form them as balls.

Well, now I've succeed baking one good chocolate cake, and I'm very happy. It took me years to make the perfect one, that doesn't have any flaws. (^^)

Happy Valentine's Day!

HISASHI お誕生日おめでとう！

I'm a bit late, but better be late than never.

2nd February, GLAY's guitarist HISASHI had his birthday!!

He's now one year older, even if it doesn't seem like he's getting any older. Guess how old he is?

This year, he turned 35. Unbelieveable, right?

I hope he had a great birthday!

変な夢 ~THOUSAND DREAMS~

Hey! みんなアイツをヘンだと笑う 「何がしたいんだ?」と
日がな一日ギターを弾く 時々フラリと旅に出たままで
「高校ぐらいは出ておきなさい」その昔父親に言われた
ちゃんと真面目に働きなさい 判ってる!
だけどウルサく言わないで

Hey! どこへでも行ける靴がある 道はどこまでも続いてる
ポケットにはコインで占う 眠れない夢が吠えている
ずっと誰にも言わなかった ずっと誰にも言えなかった
頭下げながら睨(にら)んでた 本当の自分を探してる

Ready go! Be myself
Ready go! Be myself
Ready go! Be myself
今夜ROMANTIC

踊れ 踊れ もっと Life is very short
主役を演じきれ Thousand dreams
廻れ 廻れ ずっと Lady-merry-go-round
誰の胸にも密やかな DESIRE

何もコワイもんなんかナイ ただ夢を疑うのがコワイ
人に笑われてもイイよ いつか見返してやるのさ

Ready go! Be myself
Ready go! Be myself
Ready go! Be myself
今夜ROMANTIC

鳴らせ 鳴らせ もっと 胸の鼓動をウルサがられるまで
明日この日本が沈没するかもね
だから 今夜オマエに
素直に言うよ”I LOVE YOU”

踊れ 踊れ もっと Life is very short
主役を演じきれ Thousand dreams
廻れ 廻れ ずっと Lady-merry-go-round
誰の胸にも密やかな DESIRE

Music and Lyrics: TAKURO

Istrofén

This last weekend, we had our competition at home, in Stockholm. Istrofén.

The first day, it was all shiny with the sun.

We skated as the last team in the short program. We didn't skate our best, we were on a fourth place. But we had good support from the public, because we were on our home field.

The day after, we skated our free program. We were going to skate as the first team. It was good, because then we wouldn't have time to get nervous and hear the other team's music and points and so on.

And we did skate well, I felt so good after the program. We gained quite okay points. But after this, the hard time would come. We had to wait for the other teams' points. And then we would know how we did.

I didn't wanted to look how the other teams were skating, because that would make me even more nervous about the points. So two other team mates and me got to the changing room, listening to music in high volume, so that we wouldn't be hearing the outside.

But I was curious, so I was running back and forward, in and out from the rink. But after a while, I settled down in the changing room along with the other two.

After some almost-heart-attacking minutes, all the teams had skated, and we got the final results. We had come to a fourth place... Even if we and two other teams had came on the same place at all the three competitions, we knew that we had too few points to get to the World Championships for Juniors... The mood wasn't the best ever, but after a while, everybody becan to realize the truth and we couldn't do nothing about it. And our coaches said that we skated well and we did what we could, but this time, we couln'd go that far.

After the prize ceremony, we went home. I was not in any good mood, just sitting trying to realize it. I was so tired, I fell "asleep" on my bed. But I was still hearing what the others did in the house. It felt like I was deadly tired, after all the nervosity and things like that.

But now I feel better, and we had gained new strenght, we're going to get revenge in about a month, when it is the National Championship (Swedish championship), here in Stockholm too.

Then we'll show everybody who's the real champion!! MOAHAHA!

Christer Fuglesang, back to Sweden!

25 January, thursday.

Christer Fuglesang came back from Florida. He came back around 7.30 am that day, and after arriving, he had a tight schedule.

Some schools got the opportunity to get to KTH (Kungliga Tekniska Högskolan), and hear him tell about his trip to ISS. KTH is where he took the exams for the engineering program, and that's how hw began his career as an astronaut.

Around 10 students and a teacher from our school went there. I was one of the lucky 10, and one of my classmates too. We two where so excited when we heard that we got that opportunity, to see and hear Fuglesang live!

He showed us his own filmed video from the trip, and at the same time, he talked and explained how it was. After the video, the public could ask him questions.

There were so many people and many camera men from different companies. Even our teacher came with a digital camera, with whom he got all the way down where all the other camera men where, and he took so many pictures that he said imust be around 200 or so...!

It was very cool to actually see Fuglesang live, and so on. I'm happy I took this chance to go and hear him speak about his experiences. Not everyday thing, this is. (^^)